F*ck off.

I had a chance to look through some year 10 GCSE Food Technology coursework the other day. As part of their folder work they need to come up with a new and supposedly exciting meal, research it, make it refine it and evaluate it etc.

As part of their research some of the pupils in this class had decided to write letters to celebrity chefs to get their advice. I say decided but it was clear from the standard of these that it was an idea thrust upon them and not one made of their own free will.

One pupil was creating a Pizza suitable for teenagers. Now I am not sure what's wrong with normal pizzas and actually come to think of it what would a "Teenager Pizza" have on it. Euuurgh. I'd rather not think any further on that subject.

Anyway the student had written a letter to celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay and the opening gambit was as follows:

"Dear Gordon Ramsay,

Can you please advise me on how I can obtain a high grade for my GCSE food technology project."

They continued with some other waffle but basically not so much a question about food but about the intricacies of the AQA marking scheme.

The title of my e-mail is my prediction of his response should he be able to tear himself away from being on the telly and chefing in about 8 restaurants.

Jamie Oliver it appears is also in line for some interesting mail in the future.